Spirit of Contention

"Contention fosters disunity."

-- Elder Russell M. Nelson

Of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles

**"The Canker of Contention"

This one is a good one for us all in my opinion. I don't know a single person who has never gotten angry and yelled or have vindictive thoughts at one point or another. For example, driving on the road and someone cuts you off, I know that personally I really hate that, or when someone is driving so slow in front of you and you can't pass them. I am only giving driving examples because I think that most of you can recognize that exact feeling.

This week has been an interesting one for me in learning about contention. I find that the first step in really working with the spirit is recognizing in ALL areas where contention arises. Contention doesn't even have to be physically or verbally between one person to another!! It can be stired up in your own mind and heart! Lets give an example, you are looking forward to something and it doesn't happen exactly the way you planned it. Well..whats your first reaction? Frustration, anger, dissapointment..then what do you start to do? Think negative towards that situation or usually find something to pin-point your anger towards. WOW..thats contention! Of course we all like to feel better when getting our anger out, however I believe (and its funny that I am the one saying this..because I need help in this area as well sometimes..) that anger can be taken out in different ways besides negativity. Here are just some ideas:

• Exercise!! This REALLY helps me take all my frustrations out on whatever it is that is bothering me or something that has upset me. Plus science has proven that by exercising, not only can it increase your health, it decreases your anger and depression because of the chemicals that are being involved in exercise.
• Write!! I know this sounds a bit corny, but it helps SO much. Even if its in the moment, if you have the time and ability to have paper and a pen..really..just write out what is making you upset and how you feel and then list ways you can deal with it. Science has also proven that by writing things out it activates the writing and reading part of the brain which can strengthen your ability to get in touch with what is going on in the situation than just the small part you are experiencing.
• Pray for help! Yes, whenever you are feeling the spirit of contention, it is possible to counteract negative with positive. To put your faith in a power greater than yours can lift burdens and weight off of your shoulders. Try it! :D

Of course not everyone is perfect and we all will still have our moments of frustration, anger and contention but like I said, the best thing is to recognize how often we jump to these feelings and how you might be able to make some of those angry moments into pleasant or smaller issues and think positive.

3 Nephi 11:29

"..he that hath the spirit of contention is not of me, but is of the devil, whois the father of contention, and he stirreth up the hearts of men to contend with anger, one with another."

Proverbs 18: 6-7

"A fool's lips enter into contention, and his mouth calleth for strokes.

A fool's mouth is his destruction, and his lips are the snare of his soul"

**"The Canker of Contention" link to: http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=fe6127cd3f37b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1